11 January 2014

My 2014 Word of the Year

Happy Saturday everyone! I hope you are very much enjoying the much warmer weekend! Much better than the cold we've have been enduring for the last week I'd say.

I know I'm a little late for this post, but it's better late than never!  I was go browsing through different blogs here and there this morning until I came across Rachel's blog.  I was reading of her most recent post and I was really liking it. So I decided to read through her most popular posts, and came across this idea of "Word of the Year".  Then it clicked to me that I originally saw this idea on Kenzie's blog a few days ago and wanted to join in on this goal setting trend.

So I reflected a lot on the past year and thought that perhaps there are certain things here and there I can personally improve to not only better myself, but make me see things differently.  Then it hit me just like that.

I realized that it is really easy to forget the one most important thing that helps relationships, friendships and bonds grow - trust.  

This year, I am determined to live by the word trust.  I want to be able to live life without the fear of saying too much to others.  That's a huge problem I have ... trusting others.  So this year things are going to change for the better.  I am (and will) live everyday trusting in others (to a certain extent of course).

I want to be able to trust others again... and in doing so, I think the most important thing is to learn how to open up again... especially when it comes to family.  Being in a situation where I trust one of my cousins with big secrets, and having it bite me in the ass in the end... I need to learn to trust them again.  It's been years since it happened, they've apologize, but I need to trust them again.  And I think the only way I am able to trust, if I am able to open up to them.  This is something I definitely need to work on.

This year, I will be putting my full trust in the Lord with my life.  I have this big problem of question all my decisions, actions and including the people in my life.  This year I will stop this whole stress process and just trust that the Lord has a good reason behind all of this.  I think the only way for me to accomplish this, is if I stop questioning everything that is happening.

To better my relationship with J, I need to learn to trust him more.  Obviously trust-issues are one of the big problems couples have, and I will not lie, this is something we've fought about before.  Especially when it comes to me not trusting him 100%.  I do have to say, I'm trusting him more and more everyday, which I think it is a huge improvement on itself.  But I need to be able to trust that I'm in his heart and mind.  This year I need to focus on the positive, and not relive my past relationships.  This year I need to show him that I do trust him, even if its the people who he hangs out with I don't trust, but that I need to work on to.  I think the only way for this to work this year, is to physically spend less time with him, so he will be able to do his own thing.  This is the ultimate test to see where my trust in him goes... and how much I do trust him.

Last but not least, I want to be able to trust myself.  I've been through thick and thin and I've honestly lost so much confidence in myself and in my decisions.  I always second guess everything I decide.  I always have to refer to someone else when I make a decisions because I never think I am making the right one.  This year this needs to change.  I need to learn that my decisions are probably the best decision I can make for me, myself and I.   This one will be hard... but I am determined to work on this.

And that's all I could think about right now! I'm actually excited, writing this just gives me a glimpse into my future and perhaps become the old and positive me again.

Do you have a word for 2014? Leave a comment and let me know! OR if you already wrote about it, leave a link and I'll be glad to check it out! 

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